It’s up to you: should my roommate bring his uncontrollable dog back to the shelter? | Friendship

The charge: Abdul

I love my roommate’s new dog but he doesn’t train him properly and it disrupts my life. Does the dog have to move?

Joshua and I have been living together for six years since we met at university. We always got along well; it’s laid back, fun and quite tidy. When he adopted a dog from a shelter in the midst of the pandemic – a five-year-old greyhound called Biscuit – I was elated. Biscuit is calm but a little nervous with new people because he’s been on a racetrack for so long.

But Joshua didn’t spend enough time training him, and the dog developed habits that disrupt my life. I originally wanted to move when things were really bad, but now I don’t think it should be me who should be more inconvenienced.

Things get tense with Joshua. It is too soft with Biscuit. The dog peed on the kitchen floor for the first few weeks, but slowly got into the habit of going outside. I encouraged Joshua to praise him whenever the dog was doing well, but I think I did more research than he did on greyhound training.

Biscuit also has carte blanche for the sofa during the day, which is now covered in hair. A dog needs his own bed. Joshua simply says, “Well, this is what rescue animals look like. “

Biscuit also suffers from separation anxiety; he barked every time Joshua left the room. He kept me awake screaming for hours from the living room (which was originally Biscuit’s bedroom), and Joshua started sleeping on the floor next to him to calm him down. I told Joshua that something had to change: put in place an appropriate training program or put a shock collar on the dog. In the end, he has just installed Biscuit in his room – he is now sleeping on the bed. This stopped the barking, but made matters worse because now Biscuit is in more need than ever. Joshua won’t leave him alone for 10 minutes in case he starts barking.

Joshua and I used to go to the pub with our friends, but now I barely see him, because he wants to take care of Biscuit. He should learn how to train Biscuit to behave better, or send him back to the shelter.

Defense: Joshua

Abdul assured me that adopting a rescue dog was no big deal. Now eight months later he has changed his mind

Abdul agreed that I could adopt Biscuit, otherwise I wouldn’t have. We’ve known each other for years and if Abdul wasn’t comfortable living with a dog he should have said so sooner. Biscuit is anxious and needs time to acclimatize to a home, and I think we’ve made great strides.

When Biscuit started barking a lot after moving in, I did everything to reassure him, but the obvious solution was to let him stay near me, day and night. The barking lasted six weeks and then stopped.

Abdul was understanding at first, but then he suggested techniques like using a shock collar on Biscuit, which I think is inhumane.

I appreciate that a rescue dog is a lot of work and I’m grateful for Abdul’s help with the Biscuit home training, but the accidents really didn’t last that long. Any damaged carpet, I paid to clean it. I was happy to take on the main responsibilities.

With Biscuit on the couch problem, I sought Abdul’s advice before the dog moved in and he assured me that a dog sitting there was okay. Now, eight months later, he’s changed his mind and says Biscuit shouldn’t be allowed on the couch at all. Of course, it’s going to be harder to break the habit now than it’s used to.

I don’t see the problem with Biscuit sleeping in my room at night and going on the couch during the day, when we both work. I clean the hair regularly and luckily greyhounds don’t really smell.

Maybe I was naive in thinking that everything could stay the same. I’m still in my twenties and having Biscuit is a lot of work. Abdul first threatened to move out, but now he says Biscuit should be fired.

We had a rough first month but there is no way I will bring my dog ​​back to the animal shelter, I have made a commitment. Abdul just has to decide if he can ride a bit longer until Biscuit settles down.

The Guardian Readers Jury

Should the dog be returned to the shelter?

“Poor Biscuit. No one told him he was a pack member, not the pack leader. Joshua needs to train with him so that he knows his place and can gain confidence. Once the rules are agreed upon and applied consistently, no one needs to leave and harmony can be restored. “
Maggie, 69

Like it or not, Biscuit is now part of the household and deserves to stay. Even if it was unexpected, this is a fact of life in pet ownership – training can be a very lengthy process and requires patience. If Abdul really can’t tolerate living with Biscuit and the relationship with Joshua is important to him (which it appears to be), he should move out.
Rhéa, 28 years old

Abdul seems jealous of Biscuit’s new relationship with Joshua. Some of the dog’s behaviors that initially bothered Abdul improved. If Abdul cannot agree to share his friend with a dog, he should leave the house.
Milo, 29 years old

You’re not married, Biscuit is a dog and Jeremy Kyle has been canceled. Abdul, go. Even though his behavior is a problem, it’s only been eight months. To go from ecstatic necklace to shock necklace, you clearly hadn’t thought about life with Biscuit. Make a runner, leave them on the couch with a better episode on ITV.
Thirty, 32 years old

Abdul should have thought more before agreeing to Josh take a rescue dog, as they often come in with behavioral issues. The dog was meant to change the dynamic in the apartment and clearly requires training, love and commitment from both. The dog is here to stay – Abdul should adjust or consider moving.
Graham, 63

Be the judge

So now you can be the judge, click on the poll below to tell us: Should Joshua return his dog to the shelter?
We’ll share the results next week, it’s up to you.
Voting closes Thursday, October 28 at 9 a.m. BST

Last week’s result

Last week we asked if Abby should change her ways and become more orderly like her boyfriend, Dave.

77% of you said no – Abby is innocent
22% of you said yes – Abby is guilty

Do you have a dispute that you would like to settle? Or do you want to be part of our jury? Click here

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